The Traveling Survivor and Warrior
As I live out my life sentence with metastatic breast cancer, one thing that has clearly become a passion is traveling.
Not just “big trips” like a cruise or an all-inclusive resort in a tropical setting, although I love those vacations!
I have made a decision to spend more time traveling to see family that live outside of Texas. Before my cancer diagnosis, those trips weren’t always possible due to having to coordinate time off with others, including my husband’s job. Our available paid time off had a set limit.
But now…I am taking every opportunity I can to travel and see family. For as long as I can, while I can.
With every trip, I am rewarded with new memories and a fresh perspective on my relationships.
Today, I am going to reflect on my recent trip to visit my daughter in Arizona. Buckle up and let’s go!
Time waits for no one
I got the opportunity to spend five days with my daughter in Arizona. We did a LOT of things together. Everything from visiting her favorite hole-in-the-wall Italian place for lunch to seeing to a White Sox/Cubs spring training game…White Sox won! And even visited an arcade bar where we played darts and vintage arcade games (PacMan, anyone??)
But I also got to admire and learn from her while I was there.
I got to see her in her environment, networking with her own purpose and flair. And I learned that she has figured out life way better than I ever dreamed of doing at her age.
How did this happen? How did my baby learn how to make her own way and raise the bar for others in less than 30 years?
Because she learned from me, her dad, and the mistakes that we made. She observed how not taking care of yourself before taking care of others will leave you feeling exhausted. She witnessed how losing yourself and who you are will have serious consequences on every one of your relationships.
She decided not to settle for what someone else’s version of herself should be.
When I received my cancer diagnosis, we put a new value on our relationship. We have worked very purposefully to make sure we are closer emotionally.
She has been one of my biggest cheerleaders and also one of my biggest marketing mentors as I start this business.
And she has done that without losing any of herself.
Joy List
While I was visiting, I noticed one morning that she has a “joy list” on the side of her refrigerator. It’s visible enough for her to see whenever she is cooking, putting away groceries, or getting a snack.
And that list floored me. The first four things on there are “outside walks”, “paddle boarding”, “reading a book”, and “girls night”. Spending time with her boyfriend is number five.
Number FIVE. That girl has learned that she has to refill her own cup of energy before she can enjoy and fully share with others.
WOW. That’s my girl!
It took me 54 years and a stage 4 cancer diagnosis to learn that I have to take care of me before I can take care of anyone else.
Weekly Challenge
So how are you defining and living out YOUR purpose? Are you leaving it up to others to decide who you are and where you will spend your precious time and energy? Or are you the boss of your own life, one who defines and redefines what is important to you? Are you taking care of yourself or are you running on empty, trying to satisfy work deadlines and taking care of others’ physical and emotional needs while ignoring your own?
Think about that. Write it down. Say it out loud.
And then…go forth. Be exceptional!